3.4 #5

This comic marks the start of another Patreon Cameo! Thank you very much for your support.


  1. Panel 5 is so adorable. I am relieved Neil doesn’t have to fight UberDouche, since he isn’t really trained at non-lethal takedowns.

    • “Yes, it’s because I’m not trained at non-lethal takedowns, I really didn’t wanted to kill him for being uberdouche, honest.”

  2. Ouch, Neil may be more resistant than a normal human while in his form, but that fall on the wood must have still hurt.

    • Well, at least BB!Neil doesn’t bleed out. Cameo girl, OTOH, may need urgent medical care. Even if that is proper safety glass — and the shapes I am seeing suggest otherwise — those shattered boards can do plenty of damage.

        • Maybe they will charge VD-guy with assault after this, just anything that will keep him from ever coming out on patrol again.

      • You’d be surprised at how many things from the 20s and 30s are still in use today. Although the lifeguard shack looks like a 40s-60s design. Still, I wouldn’t want to go anywhere near it barefoot, considering the squiggly sticking-out nails.

        Strangely, it does a safety glass-style spiderweb crack on the previous page, but has a full-on untempered, unlaminated shatter here. Once unlaminated plate glass cracks, it’s basically a goner, whereas laminated glass will keep its form but continue to crack, until the laminate gives out as well.

        Probably not worth stressing over, since turning things into a physics-accurate version of itself is a full-time job.

  3. Thank you Neil, your work is much appreciated. Also Neil’s face during the glomp is the greatest thing. Oh my.

  4. My cat gives me that expression when I give her hugs. I don’t think she likes hugs.

    • Yup. Patron supporters will be tossed through windows and walls until morale improves.

      • Patron supporters will be tossed through windows and walls until donations improve.

        • On the other hand, patron supporters being hugged by main character can be seen as good incentive, doesn’t it? 🙂

  5. So let’s review “VD’s” performance thus far: Strength: good. Speed: good. Tactics: Sub-par. Situational Awareness: abysmal.

    The only good thing about his decision to “rescue” Neil from the Oni is it put Neil in a position to keep him from killing or seriously injuring Ms. Cameo.

  6. How can be this start of Patreon Cameo when all people on this page were already present on previous page?

  7. Oy. Neil keeps getting mega-irritated by Venereal Dimwit in ever more varied and unexpected ways. Now he’s had to get way closer to another human than he ever wants to, purely to make up for the grandstanding, patronizing braggarts’s incompetent negligence… and this whole time, the Oni is free to rampage unchecked because Crotch-Rot Man inexplicably pulled Neil out of melee range just as he might have finally figured out how to actually hurt the damn thing.

  8. Like a true hero Neil jumps in to action to save the innocent civilian from taking damage from the fall. Suffering imbarasement in the process.

  9. I think that on top of being an idiot, Volt’s trying to impress a cute girl which is compounding on his stupidity.

  10. On a separate note it seems that this fandom’s vocabulary is extremly good when it comes to creating awesomely scathing insults for uber douche over here. I am amazed

  11. Does “H-Huh?” mean Captain Moron did NOT realize the lifeguard stand was occupied?

  12. At this point it is certain that because legal, Niel will have to go to one of the superhero schools, as he no longer has antibody defense and is now involved in a major supernatural incident, there is no choice there. However he can bargain with his level of cooperation, assuming Very tiny Dick here survives, he could make his cooperation dependent on VD either getting forced retraining on the basis of collateral damage and endangerment, or his license revoked. He decided a lifeguard post was a projectile without checking to see if anyone was still inside, imagine if there was an incident somewhere with cars around, like a road or even a parking lot, normally the car would be one of the safer places to be, being designed to absorb impact and being an obvious large target for a hero to catch if airborne, not to mention the airbags and seat belts, until that is the “hero” decides its ammunition. Bluebelle shows situational awareness about collateral damage and is powerful to boot, just needs to learn how to handle a larger variety of incidents and the public, most of the work is already done, quite frankly I wouldn’t be surprised if they did trade VD for Niel’s cooperation.

    • I don’t know where you got that idea; the Antibody defense is literally made for this sort of situation, being a supernatural incident that requires a specific individual/lineage to avert. My Patreon cameo is still more of a threat to Neil’s continued independence.

      • Like, they could still go after Neil, but that’s once again due to him taking down the mugger, not anything that’s happened on the beach.

  13. I’m assuming Neil is glaring directly at VD during the Glomp, hence the mad face, letting VD know the next part, where Neil falls on hard stuff, is all VD’s fault.

  14. Where’s Neils cousin in all of this?
    Still retrieving children? I hope they don’t try to take her home with them.
    “Mom, Dad what a great dog! Can we keep it?”